Week 5 – The Power of Forgiveness by Pastor Mark Cowart
In the Matthew 18 passage of scripture where we began this study, we saw a man forgiven a great debt and another whom the same man did not forgive a much lesser debt. You have been redeemed by the blood of Christ from an incomprehensible judgment against sin in you, and you are commanded to likewise forgive all who sin against you. To forgive someone, however, does not necessarily mean to reconcile with them in relationship. This is an important distinction that we will look into more closely here.
I wisdom dwell with prudence, and find out knowledge of witty inventions. Proverbs 8:12 KJV
Prudence is exercising sound judgment in practical matters. Wisdom from God must be appropriately applied to what it is meant for. You need to know that the practical application of forgiveness does not automatically restore the relationship. In some cases, that will be impossible, and in others, you will have a choice. But, it is a separate question from your decision to forgive. Your forgiveness does not remove the consequences of the sin by the offender. It is not your job to relieve them of the consequences of their choice. If you kill someone and go to prison for it, will God forgive you? Absolutely. Will you have to serve your sentence? Most likely.
Likewise, a person who has broken trust with you will at least experience a consequence in potential future relationship with you. There is no option but to forgive. However, there is a range of possibilities in what happens afterward with that person. There have been times over the years that I have had to let staff go, because they did such foolish things. Some were eventually restored, and some were not.
Each case is unique, and we have to trust in God’s wisdom and prudence. We must use sound judgment in practical matters, like who we trust with how much of what. There are some dogmatic answers out there regarding your posture with someone after forgiving them. I believe flexibility is key in this question – not some rigid rule of what forgiveness looks like. Our trust must first be in the Lord and how He will guide us by His Spirit. He knows these are difficult waters to navigate. The Holy Spirit is the active agent of the Godhead in the earth to persuade men, to convince us of our sin. The sin that He convicts of is rejection of Jesus Christ. What will send people to hell, if they do not hear the Spirit, is that they rejected God’s free gift of eternal life.
And when He has come, He will convict the world of sin, and of righteousness, and of judgment: Of sin, because they do not believe in Me; of righteousness, because I go to My Father and you see Me no more; of judgment, because the ruler of this world is judged. John 16:8-11 NKJV
Receiving your forgiveness may be for someone the foreshadowing of receiving God’s forgiveness through Christ in their new birth. But, only the Holy Spirit can connect the dots there for them. You are not to let them walk on you to show your longsuffering heart. That does them no good. Remember, you are to guard your heart with double diligence. You need to be prudent in your dealings with the forgiven perp. If you are not alert to it, people will take advantage of you. This is where you need to learn how to set boundaries around your soul real estate God gave you. Seek out wise counselors as you navigate the possible restoration of a close relationship.
Where there is no counsel, the people fall; But in the multitude of counselors there is safety. Proverbs 11:14 NKJV
Know that God will provide the help you need with making the decisions you must in the process. Like Him, you will sometimes need to be kind and sometimes severe.
Notice how God is both kind and severe. He is severe toward those who disobeyed, but kind to you if you continue to trust in his kindness. But if you stop trusting, you also will be cut off. Romans 11:22 AMP
Do not make the mistake of representing “universalism” which essentially states it doesn’t matter what you believe or what you do, you are going to heaven. This is a gross distortion of the goodness of God, so don’t get sucked into this demonic deception because it feels good and is SO tolerant. In extreme examples of offense, you have the responsibility to not place yourself in danger again. If exposure to the offender threatens your health and well-being, take steps to distance yourself. Call in help if needed, especially if they refuse your stated boundaries. You don’t let them in to steal from you again. You don’t ever have to trust them again, if they don’t earn it.
In summary, remember this. Forgive people. Keep your heart clean. Take it before the Lord and leave it at the cross. The cross is where things are blotted out. Also remember, though, that forgiveness does not necessarily constitute the revitalizing of a relationship. That relationship being restored may or may not happen. Study and meditate on these Kingdom truths. It is critically important that you exercise healthy forgiveness from your heart.
Therefore we ought to give the more earnest heed to the things which we have heard, lest at any time we should let them slip. Hebrews 2:1 KJV
Pray this over your life:
Father, in the name of Jesus, you know me better than I know myself. You search me and see all things. I do not want to be a person that can read and listen to truths out of your Word without it taking root and having a lasting, life-giving impact. I pray for revelation of how these truths and principles need to be continually applied to my life.
In you and you alone, my God, is true transformation possible. Amen.
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